What Hides in Lexi’s Silence (edit)

I was lost looking at those perfectly shaped and young tits. So round, so tender looking… I could even see that the light brown nipples had a slight tone of red. I just stood behind the couch, behind her, when my eyes suddenly connected to that vision, so clear through the large neckband of her loose t-shirt.

We were vacationing, my mother, my little sister, and I. We came to visit my grandma in Brazil. She lived in a small town that was created by a paradisiacal beach called Agua Azul. That translated literally as Blue Water and, oh boy, was it blue. The portion of the sea that reached those parts was a beautiful mix of green and very light blue, translucent, and the waves crashed softly onto the constantly burning sands. We left winter at home to arrive in the hottest South American summer I had ever felt, and on that day, the temperatures were reaching 43 degrees Celsius… 110 degrees Fahrenheit. No wonder Alessandra wore only a pair of shorts and a thin, white t-shirt while inside the house. There, our only solace was a fan that stood beside the small television, lazily turning its head side to side in a vain attempt to appease how hot we felt.

I was never so grateful for the scalding hot temperature, though, as it had given me that view. At that moment, I didn’t even think about what I was doing; I just marveled at the tender boobs of the girl sitting right in front of me.

That’s when my younger sister suddenly looked up, right to my face, as if she felt my stare on the soft-looking and exposed skin of her cleavage.

I froze in place. Her cheeks burned red. She knew instantly what I was doing. If not by how focused my eyes were on her bosom, by my reaction.

I thought a million things in one second. Nine hundred ninety-nine thousand, nine hundred and ninety-nine were how screwed I was.

Even though we had an excellent relationship, in my head, there was only one chance in a million that she wouldn’t feel offended and understand that it was just nature. I was a man, and my eyes just couldn’t resist at least peeking at those marvelous young breasts right there, standing so temptingly. There was no chance she would not only understand but actually be ok with that. Right?

I thought of all that while I should be saying, “I’m sorry.”

By that time, she was already asking, “Were you looking at my breasts?” And she opened a shy and unexpectedly beautiful smile. Also unexpected was Alessandra being able to ask me something like that with such ease.

I relaxed a bit. It was still wrong, but, surprisingly, it looked like she wasn’t making a big deal out of it.

“I’m sorry, sis, I just couldn’t help myself,” shame was all over my face, but I decided to go for the truth since she was so nice about it.

Alessandra being nice wasn’t surprising, though. She was a lovely girl, at least most of the time. At least with me. I was twenty-six years old, and I watched from afar while that petite brunette grew up. She was ten years younger than me, and I was already living by myself by the time I was her age. “Lexi,” as I called her, was my half-sister. My mother was Brazilian, and after she divorced my father, she got married again. Some months later, she got pregnant. At first, I hated the idea, and it was one of the reasons I moved out as soon as I could. Soon after that, my mom divorced again, a nasty break-up, and I felt compelled somehow to be more present, as it was just the two of them now. After Alessandra grew up a little bit, I started enjoying having a little sister, and she seemed to enjoy having an older brother. I would see her mostly on holidays, when I passed by, or when we vacationed together like we did that week. At those times, we enjoyed only the best of one another, as the annoyance of living together as siblings never existed. Lexi suffered from severe anxiety problems to the point of taking meds and seeing doctors at an early age. However, it didn’t seem to affect her when she talked to me, so she always jumped at the chance to have very open conversations with me every time she could. I always found that very amusing, and I loved how she felt so secure to talk about whatever was with me. Although reacting so nicely after peeking at her like that, it was surprising, to say the least.

“It’s ok. I kinda understand,” she said.

“You do?” I asked, almost in awe. How could she? I thought.

“Of course, I do. Do you think I never spend time looking at boys?” Lexi said while moving sideways and crossing her arms over the couch’s back, looking up, her full and tanned cheeks so enticingly red, a mix of shyness and sun. “Or at men… Like you?” I could still see a lot of her cleavage at that position, and I knew she was aware of that.

“Oh, you do? Or are you saying that just so I don’t feel awkward?” I asked jokingly, trying to break away from my own shame.

“Kinda… Maybe… Not really,” She answered even more shyly.

“Thank you,” I said softly, “But I don’t think it’s right for me to be looking at you like that.”

“It’s not… But that won’t be a problem unless someone knows you do, and I won’t say anything,” Lexi said reassuringly.

“You are the best, you know?” I said, caressing her long and chocolate brown hair. “I thought you would be pissed at me.”

“Why? I never gave you any reason to think that. However, I never thought you’d find me attractive either… ” She said it with the shade of a self-deprecating tone on her whispery voice.

How could I not? Didn’t this girl have a mirror? Or any other guys around? Or did she just wanted to hear me say the opposite?

Alessandra was petite, but her body was naturally toned, and it had filled up nicely everywhere that mattered. Her breasts weren’t that big, but they looked amazing – and now I knew how much. Her waist was thin, her belly was flat, and her fantastic butt was round and tight as I had only seen in Latinas. All that was enveloped in a perpetually lightly tanned skin that was just enhanced by how warm her personality was. That when she was actually able to speak, what luckily she did with me plenty. She had the face young girls have when all the angelical traces of youth met the characteristics of a sensuous woman; plump red lips on her wide mouth, thick lashes that shaded her eyes, that had the color of melting chocolate, and her hair fell straight down her back, getting wavy in the middle of its way down to her heart-shaped butt.

The thing with her was how she ran away from people, especially the ones outside our family. They made her feel nervous to the point of losing her ability to speak. If it wasn’t for that, she would have had boyfriends already, of that I was sure. I was also convinced that hadn’t happened yet, or else she would have told me. Right?

“Are you crazy? You are gorgeous,” I said scoldingly. Lexi thinking less of herself almost made me scream at her, as I tried to make her avoid that at all costs.

“You say that because you like me,” she said, again displaying a cute and shy smile… And that’s when I was sure she was teasing me. My little sister was teasing me. How wrong did it feel after realizing I was excited by that? A lot. Did it matter at that moment? Not a bit, especially after she made sure to tell me nobody would ever know. And I knew her well enough to trust her words.

“Lexi, are you telling me you don’t have a problem with me… Looking at you like I did?” I felt bold enough to ask. I whispered, even though I knew there was nobody else inside that tiny house, and that apart from us, only my mother understood English in that town.

Her full, rounded cheeks blushed even more intensely, and she looked down. Then, she shrugged and started to stammer, unable to make the words come out of her mouth, “I-I…” It had been a long, long time since that had happened last while she talked to me. She was feeling nervous, getting anxious.

I tugged a lock of her hair behind her tiny ear, then I caressed it.

“You don’t need to feel nervous. It’s ok,” I said fondly, “I’m not judging you in any way. If anything, you should be judging me.”

She took a big gulp of air, and she restarted, “I’m just saying that whatever goes on between us, I’m never telling anybody.”

She was smart, choosing the words very carefully. Lexi was scared, and that was obvious. So, she seemed to be trying to say things without actually saying them, gauging my reaction. Although, it was clear she had given it a lot of thought, as the words were already at the tip of her tongue. The question I had was: what could go on between us? Did she mean what I thought she meant?

I looked at her, at how perfect she was… I wondered how hard it probably was for her to even fathom having this conversation with me. That said, Lexi must have wanted it to happen for some time now, badly. There was no other explanation. My little sister wanted to be with someone, and in her head, the best choice was apparently me. At that moment, she almost curled into a ball, sitting sideways on the sofa. If that was as far as she could go, it would depend on me to make it actually happen. It would be my responsibility.