Unexpected Pleasure, part I

Forward

I walked back from my mail box looking through the bills. I was depressed. I wondered if anything else could go wrong in my life. The stock market was down, the man I supported for president lost the election, the economy was down, inflation raged but no one was paying attention, and a man I throughly detested was the new president of the United States. I coughed at the mere thought. We’re all going to hell in a hand basket, I said to myself. I looked at my watch, it was 3:30 pm, my wife wouldn’t be home until after 6pm.

As the cook of the home I began thinking of what I would fix for dinner. I decided on fruit salad and enchiladas. This was Southern California after all. It had been a warm fall. The temperature was hovering in the high 70s, just right for my daily mile swim in the pool.

He opened an envelope addressed to him. I recognized my mother-in-law’s handwriting and address. She was thoughtful, I had to admit. For a mother in law she wasn’t all bad. She was kind, soft spoken, a widow, and a good cook. She also had a body I wished my wife had and a wicked sense of humor that constantly bornered on the sexual side. It was a dirty birthday card.

“Whatever present you thought I was going to give you for your birthday, please accept this instead,” the cover of the card read. I opened it. The inside cover had a buxom woman in a tiny bikini with fold out lips popping out of the center of the card. It was a music card. “You’re so sexy” started playing. The credits for the song in small print was “French Affair.” I wondered who she was, or if it was a hint.

Obviously this was a hint of some kind. It was my mother in law’s way of telling me she would be visiting. I knew I would be getting the official news she would be coming for Thanksgiving from my wife Liz. Liz was a spoiled southern girl who had endured the two broken marriages of her mother, and two of her own. I was number three. The joke “third times the charm” was lost fairly quickly as I realized it was not the charm I had hoped it would be.

A divorced father of two in my own right I was not complaining, yet. I was hoping time would heal the wounds and allow for the baggage we both brought to the marriage to eventually get thrown out with the rest of the garbage. At least Annalisa is a challenging conversation and good for a fight or two, I said to myself. Thanksgiving would not be boring.

Little did I know the changes and excitement my life would be taking in many areas. Areas that would introduce him to a whole new world of thinking, and behaving. As I walked in the house and put the mail down, sex was the last thing on my mind.


* * *


When I heard my ex-wife’s mother was coming for a visit I was really bummed. For a woman in her fifties she wasn’t bad looking, that wasn’t the point, but oh my god what a bitch. She was 5’4” and about 130 pounds, a plus size c or d boobs. Her daughter, my ex, was only a c cup, and much taller at 5’8″ and 165 pounds. My mother in law was a dyed blond and she was to herself everything that a movie star could be. To the world in her makeup, fur coats, glasses, expensive watches and jewelry, she was someone that people snickered at.

She had been married three times and took the men she married for half their money each time so she was well healed but stingy as hell.

My consolation was I had a man cave. A den with a fireplace, a bathroom (it had been a master bedroom on the first level of our house at one time) and I used it as my office where I do financial consulting. (Sell, buy silver).

My wife and I had a pretty good sex life I thought. In a previous life she was very sexual, now older with three children, two girls and one boy, she more married to the kids than me. More than once I had a suspicion her son was hitting on her and there might be something going on between them.

When she got horny, about twice a month, we fucked like rabbits. I even got into her butt more than once and she would scream for me to do it. She especially liked me fucking her butt while she had a dildo in her pussy. I got her a second soft rubbery dildo that she would shove in her mouth so all three holes were filled.

During those times she would talk dirty and fantasize about a foursome, always three men doing her in round robin, fuck one hole, then move to the next, then move to the next. She also liked to talk about a black masseur she had doing her with me watching. I never told her I would enjoy that but only because it would be so degrading. Most of my fantasies regarding her was about degrading her watching other men fuck her, spank her, tie her up. She got off on it never knowing just how serious I was.

So back to this story. Her mother is coming. Great. I decided to hide in my cave. I put the four big screens on my computer up to watch the finance channels, and track the trading. I figured when they went to bed I would watch a man movie, war, crime, a good western shoot ‘em up, something.

Late one night “granny” walked in, that is what my ex’s kids called her. She wasn’t wearing her normal pair of outlandish dark glasses, or a fur coat. She came in wearing a sheer nightgown with spaghetti straps that went to her calfs, and a cover up that was just as sheer with a, you guessed it, fur collar.

She had a good smell, at a couple hundred bucks a bottle she could afford to buy the best. That was the cheap stuff for her. But it did smell good.

We talked, she had been putting down a medium priced bottle of wine and my ex had gone to bed with a migraine. A migraine for her meant she would be zonked for two days. Great, I instantly wondered if I was to be the entertainment committee? So she comes in and plops down in one of my expensive leather chairs and reclines. She had good looking legs for an older woman. I would definitely call her a cougar since every workman that showed up to work on her house in Sacramento never went away without giving her a major discount.