The Online Erotica Writer’s Guide to Etiquette

Online erotica writing is a big leap from being just a reader. Whether you’re a reader or a writer, it’s easy to see this. When you’re a reader, you can hide comfortably behind a veil of anonymity and read people’s work, get off to it, and maybe even vote or leave a comment afterwards. When the leap is made to writing erotica for other people, whether it’s for free or paid work, it comes at a hefty price, and a good part of that price is being in the public eye in one way or another.

Erotica sites, and frankly this site in particular, is like a minefield that tests your determination. There are so many traps laid out on this website designed to discourage you. If you’re new, your stories sometimes don’t even break ten thousand views, barely anyone comments and it’s super difficult to get feedback. Even if you establish yourself, some of the comments can get quite toxic and a well-reviewed story might get buried in a matter of hours because viewers are tired of seeing that title on top of the ‘Highest Rated Last 30 Days’ chart after a whole 12 hours spent sitting on the top of our little mountain.

Even without going into the political views of the forums, the attitude of this site can often be a volatile one, and I know that more than a few of us have been wishing out loud that this site have a more supportive, accepting feel. Wishing alone isn’t going to get us anywhere, unfortunately, but that change starts with us, you and I.

If you truly want positive change for this website, you should want to contribute to that yourself, so I’ve made a little essay about where to start. Welcome to The Online Erotica Writer’s Guide to Etiquette. In this essay, I’ll be outlining and expanding five things all of us, myself included, should work towards being in order to make this website a more pleasant experience for everyone. Not only that, but a few of these are basic courtesy practices we should be upholding anyway.

1. Be Humble

This one is the hardest one to achieve. Most, if not all, of us, are guilty of not following this through. I myself was an arrogant little bastard when I started writing erotica online.

It is incredibly easy for newcomer writers to trick themselves into thinking they’re altruistic and the epitome of kindness when they’re writing for free, but let’s not kid ourselves – the name of the game is by no means altruism. We write because we like attention. We all likes views, and ratings, and comments. Some authors are so obsessed with views and ratings that when their own stories aren’t doing well, they accuse innocent parties like Red Czar or Nathan Wolfe of downvoting their stories when these writers didn’t actually do anything wrong (I presume).

Being humble is one of the most important things to do to keep up a good relationship with your audience, and your writing. Very inevitably, you’re going to write at a slower pace than you do now, because life will get in the way or something, barring a work ethic like that of mypenname3000. When this happens, a few consequences will occur. This will also be covered in section three, but for now, it’s important to note that at no time does this site owe you anything. Yes, you’re writing for free, but this is something you elected to do of your own free will. If you don’t like writing anymore but want to finish your story, that’s on you. This story is absolutely filled with unfinished stories, abandoned long ago – just as you don’t have to finish yours, it won’t be anything new if you don’t. As a part of a community-driven site, the populace is what drives it forward, not a single person.

This by no means is meant to suggest that we’re not grateful for you being here. No matter who you are, I’m very grateful you’re here and reading/writing stories. At the same time, self-righteousness has been the downfall of many a writer here, and to put it simply, it would really suck if that was your fate too.

2. Be Calm

As mentioned, I was an arrogant little bastard when I first started writing here. Even if I got one or two negative comments, my next chapter would always have a paragraph-long author’s note explaining how wrong those comments were and how grateful they should be that I’m writing for free in the first place.