My best friend, Max – Part 2

David and I had gotten married about 2 years ago. He had driven the big trucks cross-country for almost a year now, much longer than we figured he would have to after he graduated with his masters degree. The demand for technicians in his field seemed to get filled up faster than he could apply for them. Now, though, we felt he had struck it big-time. NASA had taken a look at his resume and portfolio and decided they wanted him on-board. David couldn’t have agreed to take the position fast enough.

We had moved to Texas and purchased a house in a quiet little suburban neighborhood. One thing we never had problems with in this state was racial prejudice. Everyone always accepted us as educated people and treated us with respect. Being black definitely had its disadvantages in other states, but Texans were very accepting for the most part and made us feel at home. This quiet little neighborhood was no different.

While David had been truck driving, he was often gone for several weeks at a time. It only took a few times before I realized I couldn’t handle that. When I got really horny there was no one there to satisfy me, and that drove me crazy. Eventually, I ended up realizing how good our dog, Max, was to have for that purpose. Max is a rottweiler-doberman mix with a very good-natured temperament and a very large cock. It started when I got curious about how his cock would feel inside me and led up to a great sexual relationship over the next several months. An ex-boyfriend caught me the first time I had sex with Max and I had made him a regular part of the episodes I had with Max in return for his silence.

Now that we had moved, my ex-boyfriend was no longer involved with me, and while I didn’t need Max anymore because David was home every night, I still made time for Max. My dog was more satisfying than any man I had ever been with, and sometimes I just needed that good fuck he could give me. It was rarer, lately, though. David was always making time to go here and there, trying to be a good husband.

Something seemed missing between us over the last several months. The sex was good, but we talked less. I often felt like I was living my own life separate from his, even though we lived in the same house. We weren’t cold toward each other; it was more like there was nothing for us to say. I sometimes wondered if it was me withdrawing from David because of my new relationship with Max, or if he had found out about me and Max and was trying to figure out how to cope with or end his relationship with me. The uncomfortable silences increased in frequency, and David’s way of trying to atone was to take me out to eat or to a movie or some other token gesture just to keep the tension bearable. But it was taking its toll.

In high school I made a friend whom I had come to rely on heavily sometimes. He had always been there for me to talk to, no matter what I was experiencing. We were never romantically involved, although he had expressed his feelings for me on several occasions over the years. Ben was the first boy to give me flowers. He was a freshman and I was a sophomore when he showed his interest in me. I had told him I couldn’t have a boyfriend at the time, but I made sure he knew it wasn’t because he was white. We met on occasion in the school library or on the front steps of the school and just sat and talked. Now, I had been all over the world, traveling for school and pleasure. No matter where I was we talked.

Six months into David’s new job at NASA, things were pretty bad between us. I was beginning to feel more and more like an alien, not even a visitor, in my own home. My sex drive was all but gone as things got worse, and even Max suffered as much as I did. Depression was setting in when Ben called. I had been trying to convince him to visit David and me for the last few months, but something always came up and he was unable to make it. This time, though, he must have heard the desperate state I was in and agreed to come out that weekend. My heart fluttered curiously and momentarily at the thought, but I gave the fleeting feeling no further thought.

It was Wednesday and the next few nights found me sleeping restlessly as I anticipated my friend’s arrival. The emotional state I was in made me wonder whether or not I could properly host this important person in my life. Would my house be clean enough? Would the food be to his liking? Maybe we should go out to eat. Maybe he’d like to go see a movie like we used to in high school. How would he and David get along? Where should I take him to show him around? What people in the neighborhood should I introduce him to? All these questions I would normally ask of myself no matter who visited, but they now seemed to just make my life that much more miserable. Maybe if I just ignored everything it would all go away and everything would be fine.

Saturday came and I found myself looking out the window almost once an hour, biting my lower lip from time to time, holding myself in my arms, hoping it would be alright and he wouldn’t think I was turning into a terrible person. That’s how I felt about myself right now, and that isn’t what I needed to hear from someone close to me. He never used to be that way, but I hadn’t seen him in almost 5 years now. People change. As I was thinking these things, I began to wonder why I was feeling this way about his visit. My muscles were tense and my stomach was in knots. I was breathing shallow and beginning to get a headache from the muscles in my neck being so tight. I was beginning to feel hot, too, like someone turned the heat on in the middle of summer.

A knock at the door. I opened the door. Someone was standing there, but they were blurry. A voice; it sounded friendly. Dizzy; arms around me; I’m leaning on someone’s chest. Tired; dark.

The ceiling; the room is cool; the TV is on; my head is on someone’s lap; that someone is holding me. I looked down at the arm and it was white. “You must have really needed to sleep, but you really shouldn’t try sleeping while you’re standing up,” I heard Ben say softly. I tilted my head back and raised my eyes so I could see him and smiled. “You’ve been out for almost 2 hours. Here, have something to drink. Then we’re going to get out of here and go somewhere and walk outside. The sun and air will help you.” I put my hand on his and took the glass of water. I felt safe, taken care of, relaxed. Ben always made me feel that way when we were together. I felt like I could breathe.

After I finished drinking the water, Ben cajoled me outside with Max and we hopped in his car. I gave him directions to the park nearby. He figured walking the dog as we talked would help destress me and get Max some exercise. There were a few people out barbecuing, some throwing a frisbee, a couple roller-blading. We took the path around the lake and let Max make his own meandering way with us. Ben asked what was going on with me, how was I doing, and I unloaded on him. By the time I was done I felt better than I had in a long time. I also felt sort of guilty for unloading on him the way I did, but he quickly set my mind to rest, telling me that’s what friends are for.

“Are they good for anything else?” The question was out of my mouth before I knew it. Where did that come from?! I never flirted with Ben before, at least not on a conscious level! But, oddly, I found myself hoping he would say something flirtatious back. How far was I really willing to go with this?

“Lots, I’m sure,” Ben said and looked at me with a mischievous grin. My heart was pounding so hard I was sure he could hear it.

There was an awkward silent moment before I asked Ben where he was staying. He said he had come right over and had not decided where he was going to stay yet. Taking my cell phone out of my pocket, I called David and told him the situation. Getting his opinion was just habit now. David said it was alright with him if Ben stayed with us for a few days. It was now 6pm, so Ben and I walked back to his car with Max and we went back to the house.

David was there when I got home. He and Ben shook hands and began talking about David’s day at work. The two of them are computer geeks, but it amazed me that Ben could keep up with David’s conversation about things I know he had no personal experience with. NASA was a few steps up from Ben’s type of work, but he never showed that there was question he was familiar with the ideas and concepts David was working with. Thinking about it, I couldn’t remember a conversation where Ben ever felt left out or a subject that he didn’t feel comfortable talking about. He just seemed to fit whatever the topic.

After the Chinese dinner we had ordered for delivery that night, we all went to bed, anxious for the next day’s activities. Having Ben around had lifted my spirits; I felt so much better after having dumped on him at the park and then watching him get along with my husband so well. Maybe it was too obvious how good I felt with Ben around.

“Do you have feelings for him?” David asked me as we lay facing away from each other in bed.

“Of course. He’s my friend.” What would I tell him if he decided to probe further?

“You guys gonna be doing anything tomorrow?” Whew! No probing question.

“I was thinking we would go see a movie and maybe I would show him around town.”

“How long is he going to be here?”

“He hasn’t decided yet, but I don’t think it will be more than a few days.”

“He’s shorter than I imagined. Whenever you’ve talked about him he seemed almost larger than life.”

“He holds his own pretty well, don’t you think?” David could be so condescending sometimes, and it was always an immediate turn-off. I had no compunction defending Ben now.

“Have a good night,” was all he mustered.