Little Broken Toys_(1)

Lucy stared down at her brother sitting at the kitchen table and pouring a steady stream of maple syrup over the pancakes in front of him. She was always amazed how such a scrawny boy was able to eat so much and not gain any weight. “Are you even tasting that, Sammy?”

He looked up at her, cheeks full like a squirrel, and nodded.

She couldn’t help but smile. It was times like this that she had to remind herself that he wasn’t her baby brother anymore. At 20, he was a young man with the mentality of a pre-teen. Stricken with a mental illness, Sam’s autism left him with a long list of phobias, an aversion to touch, poor social skills, among other things. A gifted savant, however, the boy who was never supposed to achieve anything in life had proven himself a very talented author, a true genius of words. When he sat in front of his computer, he drifted into another world, becoming an entirely different person that manipulated sentences into art, forming a new life. And now, people all over the nation saw his picture along with a fabricated biography on the back of their hardcover novels.

Lucy brushed a strand of her shoulder length hair back behind her ear. She watched her brother with interest. Exhibiting the same sandy blond hair and sea foam green eyes, the resemblance between them was almost uncanny. He was dressed nicely, if inappropriate, sporting a dark three-piece suit. Sam had always been like that, doing and wearing whatever he wanted and not caring what anyone else thought.

“Finished!” He dropped his fork in his plate and pushed it away from him.

Lucy placed a hand on his shoulder and felt him recoil. “How was it?”

Sam’s face flushed and he lost all enthusiasm. “Fine.”

His sister smiled kindly and calmly removed her hand. “Good. Look, Sammy, I want to clean around your computer before you start writing. Do you think you can load the dishwasher while I do that?”

As his color returned to normal, he gave a slight nod. “Of course, Luce.”

Lucy knew better than to think he would actually complete the task. At one point or another he would get distracted by something. It seemed the only time he could stay focused was while he was writing.

She walked into the living room where Sam had his station near the couch. Loose-leaf paper was scattered all around the monitor with about half a dozen pens left out of the holder she bought specifically for him. She sighed, picking up the writing instruments and putting them where they belonged. Being careful not to disturb the papers, she took a dry cloth and wiped beneath them, picking up more dust than she would’ve imagined had been there. She swiped down the monitor and computer tower itself under the desk.

Curious as to the state of the desk drawers, she opened one and paused, staring in disbelief. The suggestively posed nude model adorning the erotic magazine was something she would never have believed could’ve wound up in her house. But Kayden Kross, sucking seductively on one of her fingers, was proof otherwise. Not realizing she had been holding her breath, Lucy exhaled quickly. Her little brother who would remain a child mentally had somehow come into possession of these skin magazines.

One by one, she pulled them from the computer drawer, stacking them next to the monitor. It seemed each publication she removed seemed more vulgar and improper than the last. By the end, she counted 11 magazines covering everything from teenage girls to sado-masochism. Lucy felt as if there was a great weight on her chest. Sam had seen these without anyone to explain what he was looking at. She felt like blaming herself for not watching out for him.

Lucy backed away from the computer desk and swallowed hard. “Sammy? Can you come over here for a minute?”

There was no response, but she could hear the shuffle of his Converse sneakers on the kitchen’s tile floor. Within seconds, his thin frame came into view through the archway that connected the kitchen to the living room. With long strides, he closed the distance in no time.

His eyes met hers, shining with innocence and naivety. She sighed. This had to be resolved, regardless of any embarrassment that might ensue. “Sammy, I was cleaning out your computer desk.”

She paused, hoping he would step up and make the first move by bringing up the porn. But no such luck. He stared back at her, waiting for this to go somewhere before he lost attention.

“And while I was sorting through the drawers, I found these.” Lucy turned back, picking up a couple of magazines and holding them out for him to see.

Unexpectedly, he snatched them from her grip. “They’re mine.”

Lucy blinked rapidly. That wasn’t the response she was expecting. “Sammy, do you know what these are?” She pointed at the ones remaining on the desk.

Sam walked past her to the desk, being careful not to touch her. He set the two magazines he was holding with the others. Running a hand over one of the covers, his brow furrowed, but he didn’t reply.

She sighed again and joined him by his side. She pointed a finger at some teen in pigtails with polka dot panties clutching a teddy to her bare chest. “Sammy, this is pornography. Do you know what that is? It’s images of men and women—“

“—fucking.” He finished for her.

“Samuel!” She had to stop herself from smacking him upside the head. It wasn’t his fault that he had no social filter, but it was still shocking to hear her baby brother swear. “That is not appropriate language.”

He turned his head, not quite understanding what he did wrong.

She exhaled sharply before continuing. “Men and women making love, or having sex, Sammy. It’s perfectly natural and something that people who are close enjoy doing.”

“Do you?” His question came almost before she completed what she was saying.

Lucy shifted, not wanting to lie to him. “That’s a personal matter, you don’t ask people that.”

“Oh.” He shifted his gaze back to the magazines. “But these people don’t find it personal. Others photograph them and publish it. Yet they don’t seem to mind.”

“Yes, but those people do it for money.” She was glad the conversation shifted from her.

He flipped the cover of the teen magazine, looking at the pig-tailed girl getting banged by two men. “So are they having sex because they love each other or for money? It can’t be both.”

Lucy was unsure how to answer him. She often forgot that Sam could be very perceptive when he wanted, which was usually at the worst times. “The thing is, Sammy, they would only do these sorts of things with people they trust and care about. Do you understand?”

“Yeah, I guess.” He closed the magazine and straightened the stack. Putting both hands on the desk, he leaned forward and braced himself up. “I love you, Luce.”

“And I love you too. Now can you tell me where you got the pornography?” She put a hand on his back, noticing that he didn’t flinch like usual.

With one swift motion, he pushed off the table and cupped his sister’s face with both hands bringing her close and kissing her passionately on the lips. His fingers trailed down her jaw line, finding her chest. He pressed himself closer to her.

Lucy was taken by surprise, not entirely sure what was happening. This couldn’t be her brother, the man who didn’t even want to hold someone’s hand, being so intimate. She pulled away, taking a few steps back. “Sam! What are you doing?!”

He looked puzzled. “We love each other, don’t we? Why can’t we do what they’re doing?”

“Because that’s not something brothers and sisters do!” She tried not to raise her voice, but she was still recoiling from the shock.

“Why?”

She threw her hands up in the air. “Because it’s not right! That’s why.”

“But you’re the only person I love. Who else am I supposed to be with?” He took a step towards her, but stopped within arm’s length.

Lucy sighed, suddenly stung by her own words.