Katherine Parr, the Prefects Tale

Katherine Parr, the Prefects Tale

I am a student at Katherine Parr’s school. Katherine Parr is a very exclusive private all –girls boarding school sited miles from anywhere in the wilds of Cumbria. The parents who sent their children there were very keen on discipline and Katherine Parr obliged them with a strict regime of corporal punishment in the proud tradition of its eponymous founder. I said all girls but no, that’s not entirely true. You see teachers’ sons were allowed to attend the school due to its remote location making other arrangements unpractical and there were usually about two or three in each year at the school. They were given no special treatment and their presence did lead to some embarrassment for both boys and girls, given the punishment regime of the school. I am a teacher’s son, this is my story.

I was never very popular at Katherine Parr. The other lads shunned me, I was better at English and Maths and Science than at football and fighting I was also overweight and had worn glasses and braces until last year when I had finally been able to ditch the braces. At the same time I swapped my glasses for contacts. This made me a ‘freak’ as well as a ‘swot’” and I was either picked on or ignored by the popular crowd of boys and girls. However I had always taken care to be popular amongst the teachers. Even in French, my worst subject, I had always taken care to try my best. When I joined the sixth form this year it all paid off and I received that rarest of honours, I was one of only three male prefects in the entire school. No-body dared to pick on me now that I had the power to spank pupils or send them to their housemaster for the cane. Even the other newly made prefects restricted themselves to the odd snide comments.

It was two weeks into term when my first chance for revenge came. The Headmaster was having one of his periodic crackdowns on smokers and had asked all the prefects to keep an eye out on the usual spots (actually with the school’s strict rules the usual spots changed
on a weekly if not daily basis). So it was that I took twenty minutes of my lunch hour to wander round some secluded areas. I was about to give up when I heard a snatch of conversation from two fourth year girls. “….Just been for a tab round the back of the language lab. Prefects haven’t clocked that one yet.” I smiled and wandered off in that direction.

As I rounded the corner I caught a whiff of smoke and saw a group of three fifth year girls puffing on silk cuts. Behind them were three familiar figures” Richard, Matthew and Dave were the leaders of the ’in crowd’ in my year and my chief tormentors” this was going to be sweet! They were grouped in a small huddle, however I could see only one cigarette, I sniffed again and smiled in triumph, that wasn’t tobacco! I cleared my throat loudly and the six students froze. I marched over to Richard and snatched the joint from his hand before he could recover. I stubbed it out on the wall and palmed it. Then I turned to the three girls. “Put those out,” I snapped. “All of you come with me”

I led them all into the school building and into an empty classroom. “You three wait here” I said to the girls. “Come on” I snapped at the others and led them on down the corridor to
the Headmaster s study. I knocked and waited” Come,” Mr Critchley ordered. I opened the door and ushered the three miscreants in and then stepped in after them closing
the door. I succinctly explained how I had found them just a few minutes ago. I handed the half smoked spliff to the Head and he sniffed it and frowned deeper. “Thank you” he said to me gravely.
” My pleasure,” I replied evenly. “ Just doing my job. Now if you’ll excuse me Sir I have some cigarette smokers I’m going to deal with myself.”
“Of course,” the Headmaster replied. “You were right to bring this to me”
I returned to deal with the fifth year girls with a renewed spring in my step. I love being a prefect.

Richard, Dave and Matthew s fate was announced in assembly the next day. Richard had been identified as the instigator, a baggie was found in his pocket and he admitted to being the one who got it for the others. So while Dave and Matthew would each receive twelve of
the best at a Whole School Public, Richard would be getting the birch. Whole School Publics were almost unheard of. House Publics were rare enough, one a year, if that.