It Wasn’t Me.

This story was difficult for me to write. Not because there’s violence or anger. I’ve done that before. Not because it’s dark, although it is. This isn’t the first thing I wrote that you weren’t supposed to giggle or rub your way through. It has the good v. evil struggle that some writers explore, although I’m not sure, in this case, how good “good” is, or whether “evil” is to be hated or pitied.

I felt the urge to create something disturbing and to challenge myself to write something I’ve never done before. Here’s my first attempt at writing a story with male characters who interact sexually. They love each other, for a variety of reasons and in a variety of ways.

* * * * * * * * * *

“Put the knife down, Randy,” I said.

He acted like he didn’t hear me. I walked closer to him and clicked off the safety on her gun. “For God’s sake, Randy, put the fucking knife down and get off her. Now.” I was struggling to keep my voice calm. This was my brother, after all. My identical twin brother.

“You’re being a real buzz-killer, bro,” he said. “You always were. Never any fun. Always acting like you had to be the conscience for both of us. Well, it’s time to shut the fuck up and back the fuck off. You should know why I have to do this,” he said. He pushed himself up on one arm, still on top of her. He moved the knife slowly away from the side of her neck, a tiny red line appearing as he slid just the gleaming point of it over her skin, teasing her with it. He thrust his pelvis, forcing his penis further into her.

There was nothing I dared to do.

Maria somehow controlled her breathing as Randy rested the tip of his switchblade in the hollow of her throat.

“You know what happens next, don’t you, bro?” He pushed again, driving his cock deeper into Chief of Detectives Maria Rodriguez’ shaved pussy. “I’m gonna fuck her better than you ever did, and then I’m gonna kill her. Just like all the rest.” Thrust.

“What do you mean, ‘all the rest’?”

“I’m onto you, Ronnie. I’ve been watching, you know. You’re the king of short-term relationships. You never wondered why those girls stopped calling? Why you couldn’t reach them? They’re dead, that’s why.”

“Dead?”

“Don’t feel bad. They didn’t love you. They weren’t worthy of you. They just needed a good fuck.” Thrust.

“You killed them?” If that was true, my twin brother was a serial killer.

“Yeah. They were trashy, dumb sluts. No one misses them. This time, you caught me, so you get to watch. You might as well. You’re the guilty one here. If you pull that trigger, the entire world will see you that way. You’re fucked, just like your current girlfriend.” Thrust. “Put the gun back where you found it, bro. You know I’m right.”

“You killed them? You killed those women?” I asked.

“Sure. It was easy. They let me into their homes, ‘cuz they thought I was you. You never even told some of them you had a beloved twin, did you? That hurts, bro. Anyway, they trusted me, at least until they knew they were going to die. Abject terror on the face of a dumb bitch can be a big turn-on.” Thrust.

“The cops haven’t stopped you yet, but I will. This ends now. I’ll kill you. I’ll blow your sick fucking head off,” I said.

“Well that will just solve everything, won’t it?” Randy asked, flashing me what appeared to be a smile. Thrust. “They’ll think you’re guilty of ALL the murders if you kill me. It’ll blow their minds. I’m already dead, remember? Plus, my DNA is as close to yours as anyone on earth. Fuck that ‘copy number variants’ shit on gene matching. You left enough DNA in those girls’ homes and pussies to confuse anyone.”

“So what?” I shouted.

“If they start with the assumption that you’re the killer, they’ll be able to poke holes in a genetics defense. You’re fucked, bro. The only way you stay off death row is if you let me live.” Thrust. “She dies, but I live.”

“No, she lives, and she testifies to the whole damn thing. I won’t do time, Randy. I won’t have committed a crime. She might have to bust me for something like illegal discharge of a firearm or some such shit, but no more women will lose their lives because of you.”

“I do believe you’re serious. You are, aren’t you?” he laughed. The tip of his ugly knife was still poised to perform a rather messy tracheotomy on Maria. Thrust.

“Dead fucking serious. I will kill you. Put the knife away, and get off her now,” I said. I took a step closer to the bed. There was no way I would miss his head at this distance.

“Don’t get any closer, Ronnie,” he said. Thrust. “Here’s how it’s going to go down. You shoot me – my weight alone will drive this blade practically through to her spine. She might bleed out, or she might drown in her own blood, but she will die. So will I, obviously, although for some reason you don’t seem to care about that. You’ll still be a killer, only now, it’s for real.” Thrust.

“Don’t hurt her, Randy. She doesn’t know anything about you. No one knows about you.”

“She does now, doesn’t she? There’s really only one thing I can think of to do about that. You’d better leave if you don’t want to see it.” Thrust.

“I won’t let you do this.”

“Of course you will. You can’t take the risk of murdering me. After all, it will be obvious that it was you that shot me, and if you killed once, who knows? They won’t have me to prosecute. It’s okay. I can see you understand. I’m watching your finger. I know you. Hell, I am you, and you’re me. You’re not gonna shoot.” Thrust.

Maria’s quiet tears spilled over onto the pillow, her lips moving in mute prayer as he energetically raped her. Her wrists were held to the bed-frame with her service cuffs, and cruel lengths of bare wire cut at her ankles. Relentlessly, she strained against her shackles, spotting the bed sheets with the sweat and blood of her struggles.

He pinned her to the bed with his body weight and kissed and bit lewdly at her neck. He was safe for the moment, and he knew it. Flaunted it. If I shot him now, the bullet could do as much harm to Maria as his knife.

In the time that I’ve known this woman, we’ve played a few games. Cops and robbers was an obvious favorite. But those restraints were padded, and the most lethal object involved in a night of fun was a gently handled leather flail. Sometime, our evenings started out with me “resisting arrest” and then having to work my way out of mt bindings so I could overpower her and fuck her.

This was different. There was no safe word.

I felt cold sweat start to form on the back of my hand. Would he make a move, a mistake, create a split-second window of opportunity where I might be able to shoot him without having her die as a result? At this point, I wasn’t worrying about the consequences. My brother would probably die very soon. It was just a question of whether Maria would too.

* * * * * * * * * *

We’re identical twins. As children, we spent all our time together. We shared a room, and wouldn’t have had it any other way. We were close, and as some twins report they do, we could sense each other’s feelings about things, almost read each other’s minds.

The problems between us started when we were teenagers. We were noticing girls, whispering to each other about them, sharing fantasies and secrets when we actually got to do something with one. I even let him pretend to be me to cop a feel from my one girlfriend in high school, since he had never touched a girl’s boobs. That was stupid. He managed to get her bra unfastened and to touch her bare nipples. I never got that far with her.

When you share a room with someone, a soul you’ve known on some level since before your birth, you’re living with a person who is inside your head. We knew when our horny talk would lead to some hand time under the covers when we turned our lights out.

One night, just as I was discretely trying to cum into the tissues I had smuggled into my bed, Randy said, “I want to see it.”

“What?”

“I want to see it,” he repeated.

“See what?”

He chuckled. “I know what you’re doing over there. After those videos we watched tonight, I was gonna do the same thing.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I lied.

“Bro, this is me you’re talking to. Stop bullshitting. You were jerking off. Admit it.”

“Okay, yeah, I was. So what? It’s not like I haven’t heard you doing it.”

“I’m sure you have. I was gonna wait tonight until you fell asleep, but you were pretty loud. So, I want to see it,” he repeated.

“You keep saying that. What? You want to see my dick?”

“Yeah,” Randy said, turning on the light on the nightstand between our beds. “I want to see what it looks like when you cum.”

“It probably looks like yours,” I said. “Haven’t you ever watched yourself do it?”

“Sure, but I don’t think it will be the same. Please, Ronnie.”

It seemed like a strange request. We were supposed to be looking at girls, weren’t we?

“Ronnie? Please? I really want to see it,” he persisted.

“I don’t know. That seems a little weird,” I said.

“Why? Because we’re two guys?” he asked.

“Well, yeah. That’s gay, isn’t it?”

“I don’t know,” Randy said. “I’m not sure it counts since we’re brothers.”

“That makes it even kinda weirder, doesn’t it? Isn’t that like, incest, or something?” I asked.

“Look at it this way,” my twin rationalized. “It’s not gay if you watch yourself jerk off, is it?”

“No.”

“And it’s not incest if you make yourself cum, right?”

“I sure as hell hope not,” I smirked.

“You and I are the closest form of relative a person can have. We’re identical twins. Almost like clones of each other. We grew from the same egg and sperm. You are me, and I’m you. It would be like watching yourself jerk off in front of the mirror. I bet you’ve done that, haven’t you?” he asked.

“Well, yeah, I have.”

“I have too. Now I want to see it without a mirror. C’mon, bro. It’s not like I’m going to tell anyone.”

Even though I knew Randy’s logic was completely wrong, it made some kind of sense. Plus, I had been close enough that I would have a bad case of blue balls in the morning if I stopped now. “What do you want me to do?”

“I don’t know…. Just sit on the edge of your bed and whip it out.”

I decided I could do that. I had been thinking about hot, curvy, blond Chelsea, the girl that sat next to me in Calculus, before my brother interrupted me.