Having Sex with Lots of People (parts 1-5)

PART 1:

I walked downstairs in the morning.

My mom said “yo bitch wut da fux up”

And I said, “Excuse me, mother, but I find your immature and juvenile language rather offensive”

So she got pissed and raped me. First she took off my clothes and started sucking my dick than she produced a dildo from thin air and shoved it up my ass.

Than I got ready for school and went to school.

At school I saw some hot girls that I wanted to fuck.

So here’s what I did:

I sharpened a pencil REAL sharp and stabbed the teacher in the heart and she died.

Then me and my friends produced knifes that we had stolen from the kitchen. One of my friends, Billy, was so bad-ass that he had a gun so he pointed it at everyone.

One boy blocked the door so the kids couldn’t get out. Then we said
“If anyone moves or screams or tries to get away we’ll kill you and pop a cap in yo ass, bitches”.

I told everyone to jump out the window and die. They did because I had previously injected them with drugs.

Except the girls I wanted to fuck. I took their clothes off and tied them up.

Then I fucked them. I took my penis out of my pants. I was proud of it because I was only 9 and it was 13.5 inches long, effectively making it the biggest in the class and bigger than the teacher’s dicks too (And I know that for a fact )

I put my penis in one girls vagina. She was really tight and my dick was so big it only fit half way into her. So I pushed REALLY hard and it came out her ass. LOTS of blood gushed out, onto the floor. My friend ate the blood and got a boner because he’s screwed up.

Then I came so hard it hit the back wall.

“OK, who’s next!” I shouted!

All the girls wanted me to fuck them, so I did.

Then, the seriousness of what I had just done hit me.

So I ran away from school, making sure I didn’t get caught. My friends also came. I figured I might look a wee bit conspicuous, what with all the blood and come on my and dead people in da classroom.

So I was lucky to escape with my LIFE!

I quickly dashed to the local McDonalds and ordered a burger and smeared it all over me so I would be bloody anyways and it wouldn’t look too odd. My friends did that too. Then we ate some chicken McNuggets because we like the way they taste!!!

Then, I realized: I had forgotten to put my clothes on! Here I was, in the middle of the street, covered in blood and hamburger juice, naked. My friends were luckier because they had remembered their clothing.

“Oh, shit!” I thought. Then the server lady ran out of McDonalds.

“WHAT THE FUCK DO U THINK YOU’RE DOING! NO SHOES NO SHIRT NO SERVICE NOT TO MENTION NO PANTS OR UNDERPANTS!”

So she started kicking me and punching me and raping me and I was like “Oh shit, this ain’t all that good”

But then my friend shot her and my other friend had sex with the corpse and listened to Cannibal Corpse on his iPod.

Then we went to my house and hid under the bed. That was the scariest, most embarassing moment of my life!!!!!

Then I cleane dup, sent myf riends home, and continued with my day-2-day life. No-one ever found out. I was quite lucky, because if they had used forensics I would’ve been screwed.


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PART 2:

My life began in 1999. I was born at home. I am now 9 years old.
The most distinguished feature about me is my big dick. OK, I exaggerated a little about the 13.5 inches. It’s only 11 inches.
But that’s bigger than just about everyone, even porn stars with massive cocks so I’m happy.
I used to attend school, until the big “incedent”.
To say my parents weren’t particularly pleased with me for killing my teacher and all the students in my class as well as violently raping some of them,
then going out naked on the streets covered in blood is an understatement.
When they found out, they took me out of school for the rest of the year.