Dial 911!

Dial 911

Sometimes your life-changing moments aren’t apparent until well after they are over. My cell phone rang. No big deal, or so I thought. I had a 1990 Porsche 911 for sale and the guy on the other end was several hundred miles away. The car was exactly what he was looking for and the price was right. He was headed my way this weekend on a business trip with his wife. Would I meet him half way if he brought certified funds? Hell yes I would. I drove the 2 hours hoping I would not be disappointed.

I met Jay and his wife Lisa in the Hotel parking lot. He drove the car and loved it. Jay was a great guy, loved Porsches (and even said it properly, with TWO syllables…) and knew what he was looking for. He also knew early on that the car was worth every penny I was asking, maybe more. We really hit it off, and I liked his wife too. She was cute, blonde and fun to be around. If we lived closer we would have become great friends.

But there was a problem. Jay had been planning on low-balling me on the price and his check was for thousands less than what we’d agreed on. It was a classic tactic. I’d driven all the way over there; was I going to refuse a deal over a couple grand? Why yes I would. Jay could sense this during our conversation and test drive so he confessed what he had been planning while his business associates gathered to look over the car.
“Look,” he said. “I’m really sorry for trying to pull this on you. I was going to try to steal it but now I feel bad! I’m sorry I don’t have the extra money! Let me make it up to you by taking you to dinner.” He gestured at his co-workers.
“These guys won’t mind and you’ll like them. They’re all fun and we’re going to Hooters in a couple minutes. Please join us for dinner!” I was royally pissed, but I figured I might as well have a nice dinner on their tab. The scenery wasn’t going to hurt my mood either.

The group varied in age from mid thirties to the low fifties. Some of the guys were older and balding, some were still at a stage when they worked out 3 times a week. While the women varied too they were all GREAT fun to talk to. As the beer flowed I got over being ticked and actually had quite a good time. One of the other guys, Brad, also loved Porsches and had an old 911. His wife Michelle was a TALL brunette with hair flowing halfway down her back. I was absolutely captivated. Bob and Stacy sat next to them and the women kept leaning toward each other and whispering to each other. Then they’d lean their heads back and laugh.

After we all had dessert the lease on all the beer I’d consumed expired and a quick trip to the restroom was called for. When I came out the whole group was in a huddle. As I approached, Jay met me in the isle.

“Alright, I lied to you again. This trip isn’t a business meeting. Here, have a seat.” He said, pointing to a bar stool. “Look, all these people are swingers. We meet here a couple times a year for a weekend of completely crazy sex. The group would like you join us if you are interested.” I about fell down.

“Uh, well…um.” was all I could say. I’d read all the men’s magazines and the letters, thinking they were all fakes. I was quickly running some of the most recent issues through my mind.
“Jesus,” I thought. “Were those stories real?!?” I have a pretty good image of my sexual prowess. Or I did up until 10 seconds ago. I’d also believed the women that I had slept with when they told me that I was ‘plenty big’. I remembered the locker rooms from high school and had conveniently blocked that evidence from my mind. Was I ready to find out the awful truth, good bad or ugly? No time like the present! I swallowed heavily (hoping Michelle would be the next one to do so!) and said I’d at least come up to the suite and see what developed.

When I got there the living room was filled with people drinking beer in various stages of undress. A guy on the couch was rubbing the shoulders of a woman sitting on the floor in front of him as he told a joke to the other couple on the couch who were pawing at each other like prom night. As I walked over to the cooler on the floor for a beer I sneaked a peak over towards the bed in the adjoining room. There was a guy on his back. He had two women with him, none of whom were wearing a stitch! One lady was obviously going down on him as she knelt between his legs. The other one was kissing him while rubbing his nipples. The girl giving the hummer had her hand between the other girl’s legs and was rubbing her pussy with her thumb. Slowly she’d run her thumb from the tip of her clit to the entrance of her cunt. After a few lazy circles she’d insert it all the way and then slowly pull it out again. Then she’d start over.

I hit the end table with my shin, lost my balance and fell headlong behind the couch. Empty beer cans, pretzels and paper plates went flying.