Awakening of a BBW

Lorelei was an odd girl. European-born, she was well educated and quite competent. Her family of origin was not a particularly supportive atmosphere. Her father had left when she was still a toddler, and her mother worked to raise her and her two older sisters by herself.

Lorelei was not neurotically shy, but hated meeting new people. She tended to avoid creating conversations in groups when out at bars or clubs. She was oddly shaped: a rather short 5’ 1”, and reubenesque 160 lbs. She was by no means ugly, but she thought her nose was too big and considered her disproportionately large breasts to be a deficit to her appearance. She was not thrilled with her body, and it was a source of embarrassment and shame for her. Lorelei did have some pretty serious issues; she suffered from chronic depression and some recurring medical problems that weren’t debilitating, but only added to her sense of woe. Among these were reproductive issues that eliminated her chances for giving birth. She found this particularly crushing somehow, although she’d never had sex and couldn’t imagine finding someone to have a family with anyway. But the idea that this mantle of womanhood could not be hers exacerbated her depression when she dwelt on it.

Lorelei worked at a marketing company with a young man named Curt, and she quickly developed a crush on him. He was the tortured artist type, angst-ridden and creative, great with words and quite emotional. Curt was in a rock band that frequently played small clubs around town, and he religiously invited Lorelei to attend. He always offered her comp tickets and guest list passes. She finally relented one Thursday night, hoping perhaps her attendance would woo Curt into her affections.

Lorelei arrived at the club at 10 o’clock. Curt’s band was slated to take the stage at 10:30, but she was notoriously paranoid about finding street parking downtown. But she had lucked out this time, and it gave her a few minutes of discomfort as the opening band finished their set and started to strike their gear from the tiny stage. Lorelei didn’t drink alcohol, so she ordered a Coke and found a quiet table in a corner. The club was packed, and the sheer volume of people, combined with an overactive heating system, pushed the ambient temperature in the room well past comfortable. She sat alone, feeling awkward and foolish, and almost considered leaving. But within minutes she saw Curt and his gang start loading gear onto the stage. The stage lights were down, and all four shapes were in silhouette and shadow. Ten minutes later, a quick line check and some mike adjustments signaled that the band was ready. The chatter in the smoke-filled club slowly relented, and soon the room was bathed in hushed anticipation.

Lorelei’s heart leapt in her chest when the explosive sound of the band’s opening chords burst from the stage and the enormous loudspeaker array that hung impossibly from the ceiling. The stage lights flared in a green spray across the band and lit the members for the first time. She saw Curt out front, eyes clamped shut, his right hand hammering away at the guitar strings with a pick, his mouth glued to the microphone. His voice was like a clarion, gritty and raw, but powerfully emotive and honest. She took him in, smiling at his slight potbelly and unlaced shoes. Her crush grew in that moment, and she drank in the sight. Her crotch tingled slightly, and she moved the thought to the back of her mind. The music was right up her alley, melodic and fierce, rhythmic and driving, but not angry or trite. She tapped her knees absentmindedly to the beat, and was thoroughly enjoying the show.

Lorelei finally pulled her eyes from Curt and investigated the rest of the band. The lead guitarist was quite tall and lanky, with his thin gangly left arm traveling the length of the guitar neck. He was almost clownish up there. ‘That must be Joe,’ Lorelei mused, recalling the band member names Curt had mentioned so many times before in conversation. Joe flailed comically as he executed a shrill but tasteful guitar solo while the band vamped. She then moved to the drummer, who sat atop a low riser above the stage. He was not as well lit, but he seemed passionate in his craft, and rather cute, to boot. ‘Hmm, Travis, I think,’ she recalled and moved her eyes to the final performer.

The bass player stood tall and solid, his fingers flickering over the strings, his body pulsing in time. His short hair and well-groomed Vandyke beard, sans moustache, framed his face well, and his strong jaw line and proportionate facial features made him instantly attractive to Lorelei. ‘Kael,’ she breathed aloud. Her eyes fixed on Kael, watching his body bounce rhythmically, his head bobbing. His eyes were closed, and he bit his lower lip just slightly. He was clearly in the moment, and she could make out his distinctive, pleasant bass lines under the wall of guitar sound that emanated from the stage. Suddenly, Kael lunged forward and put his mouth to a microphone. One second later, three-part harmony broke out, with Curt, Kael and Joe all executing their parts with precision and grace. The sound was lush, and Lorelei swooned at the rich aural patterns.

The others backed away, and Curt remained, finishing the remaining lyrics. The song ended abruptly but perfectly when the instruments found different notes and held them as the drums crashed loudly. The notes rang clear, and the decay of the cymbals finally ebbed. Lorelei put her hand to her chest, her heart thumping loudly at this amazing performance. The crowd burst into vigorous applause and whistles. Lorelei clapped enthusiastically. She had fallen in love with this band and their irresistible sound, not to mention a couple of the band members!

Curt made small talk for a moment, and with little delay the band started another song. This one was slower, softer, and very sensual. Lorelei’s crotch tingled again, and she pressed her thick thighs together. She now wished she’d worn something sexier, but then checked her optimism with a thought of what these guys would probably think of her body. She put the thought out of her mind, and concentrated on the band and their sultry song. She watched Kael with particular interest, admiring his style and his talent. Occasional harmony parts brought Kael to the microphone and the better lighting. Lorelei watched his left hand slide expertly along the long neck of his bass, never unsure of what notes came next. His right hand fingered the strings precisely. She started staring at his fingers; his index and middle finger alternately stroking one or the other of the four thick bass strings. Lorelei’s pussy positively glowed, and she felt herself becoming wet. Something about the sight of his strong, thick fingers moving with such purpose, speed and intensity made her hornier than she’d been in months. She found herself rubbing her tongue against the backside of her upper teeth, and her mouth was watering precipitously. She squeezed her thighs again and felt her pussy throb under the pressure.

The song ended finally, and the band played another 35 minutes, each song a new tapestry of lyric and tone that rewarded Lorelei for agreeing to come to the show. After the band ended and torn down their gear to allow the final band to take the stage, Curt’s melodies stuck in her head. The last band had already started when Curt and the guys emerged from the backstage area, having presumably broken their gear down and packed it for transit into their respective cars. Lorelei watched as Curt, Joe, Travis and Kael greeted other fans and friends as they received congratulations and praise from their small but adoring group of supporters. Finally Curt spotted Lorelei in the corner and waved enthusiastically. He made a beeline for her table and greeted her warmly. Yelling over the performing act, Curt thanked her for coming, and she lavished him with heartfelt praise and compliments. He then asked if she’d had a chance to meet the band yet. She shook her head and became shy. He smiled, then turned and waved to his band mates.

The three young men worked their way over to Curt and his friend, and in turn each introduced themselves to Lorelei. She was on one hand thrilled to meet them, but also felt quite uncomfortable receiving all this attention. When it was Kael’s turn to shake her hand and offer his salutation, Lorelei became particularly nervous. Up close he was doubly attractive, and his sweaty face shone ruddy in the dim bar lighting. She took his hand in handshake, and found it to be deceptively soft and supple. Her small pudgy hand seemed to her to disappear into his large strong hand. She suppressed a sigh at the touch, which had sent an electric jolt right down to her clit. She forced a kind smile and said the obligatory nice-to-meet-you. She couldn’t tell if he seemed particularly friendly, but her mind raced with fantasies of her and Kael locked in a hot passionate kiss. Lorelei blinked to clear her vision, and shouted some general praise to the band for their performance. The current act was particularly loud, and further conversation was rendered impractical. The guys nodded in acknowledgement and moved out into the bar to find other friends with whom to share a post-gig drink.

Lorelei breathed a sigh of relief as the stressful situation dissolved before her eyes. She regretted their departure, but her solitude was her solace, and though she felt suddenly quite alone, she also felt equally more comfortable. She listened to the remainder of the current song, then slipped quietly from her stool and out the front door. She walked quickly to her car, the cold November air a great astringent on her perspiring skin. She drove home in silence, her mind tumbling with sexual fantasies of Kael. ‘Well, I guess I don’t have to try to seduce Curt anymore,’ she laughed to herself. The glorious apparition of Kael on that smoky stage made her fleeting crush on Curt irrelevant. Lorelei pulled into her apartment complex parking lot, and trudged up the stairs and down the hallway to her small efficiency apartment. She warmly greeted the mewing cat Oscar and dropped her purse on the kitchen counter. She got into her sleeping clothes and did her nightly routine of urination, face washing, contact lens removal and tooth brushing. She slid happily into her warm bed, and Oscar soon joined. She couldn’t get the vision of Kael out of her head, so she flipped onto her stomach and put her hand to the front of her panties. They were slightly damp. She slipped a hand under the waistband and found her soft, wet pussy lips. ‘Oh, God,’ Lorelei muttered, ‘why do I always fall for the ones beyond my reach?’ as her fingers slipped pleasurably through the familiar folds of her pussy. ‘Why can’t it ever go my way?’ she mumbled, and then fell silent as she worked herself to orgasm with remarkable purpose. Finally she pulled her hand loose of her panties and settled in for some sleep.

The next morning, Lorelei greeted Curt with more compliments on the previous night’s performance. He asked her if she’d like to be on the band’s email list. She nodded enthusiastically and thanked him again for his relentless invitations, adding that she was glad he hadn’t stopped asking. She gave him her personal email address, a Yahoo account with a typically girly username. He smiled broadly. The day went normally, and while Lorelei had fleeting thoughts of Kael, she was all business the rest of the day.

A week or so later, as she prepared for bed, Lorelei got an email from Curt about another upcoming show for the following week. As she considered whether or not to attend, she noticed that Curt had carbon-copied the other band members in addition to the fan list address. Joe’s was clearly a work address, joe.mortonson@ whatever company it was. Travis’ email address was a Yahoo one like hers, only with some wacky video game related username. When she saw Kael’s email address, Lorelei’s heart sank, KaelandBetsy@ something or other. She hadn’t noticed a ring on his hand at the show, but it hardly mattered now. She was surprised to find herself on the verge of crying, and she breathed deeply to fight the urge. She sat at her computer, Oscar sitting obliviously on her lap.

She stared at the screen and pictured Kael’s glistening face glowing red in the hot bar. Lorelei felt a strong urge to masturbate, so she kicked Oscar from her thick bare thighs.